Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

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Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Hanky Panky on Sun Jul 28, 2013 4:27 am


I'm going to try writing most of this in prose. I'll welcome any and all offers to illustrate!

"Well? Let's battle." Bianca eyed Hanky, expecting him to comply immediately. The young trainer hadn't even had a chance to fully inspect the pokeball he chose, much less the pokemon. It was small and vigorous. He released it from its container and nodded.

"All right," he said. It was simple, curt. Hanky was the stoic type. A silent protagonist. The pokemon he had chosen looked up at its new trainer, searching his eyes for some kind of sign. Was he capable? Did he know the dangers of battling? It could discern nothing from the boy's face. Bianca released her chosen partner, and the battle began.

Hanky steeled himself by imitating the expression of a trainer whose name he'd long forgotten. The trainer was in the League competition for some far-off country, and had performed admirably. His face was unflinching. Perhaps in imitation, Hanky could find some of the nameless trainer's determination.

Almost as soon as it had began, the battle was over. Perhaps it was because the two trainers were relatively inexperienced, and mostly just watched their companions wrestle on the floor. Admittedly, it looked as if they were playing. But Hanky's Oshawott had the upper hand. The Tepig was forced to yield, in the end. Hanky smiled. He was excited to have won his first ever pokemon battle. Bianca shared the same excitement, though she lost. There was no disappointment in her eyes. The third youngster in the room inspected both pokemon for injuries. It seemed that maybe the two creatures had been just playing, after all. Then he reached for his own pokeball.

"Actually, since you battled with Bianca, I was hoping you'd battle with me, too," Cheren said. Hanky nodded. The two boys locked eyes while their pokemon brawled it out. In the end, Cheren's Snivy tapped out. The Oshawott was simply too rambunctious. Rambunctious enough to make a horrid mess out of Hanky's bedroom. The newly minted trainers rushed downstairs to tell Hanky's mother what had happened.

She laughed and offered to clean up the mess. Then she hurried Hanky, Cheren, and Bianca over to the professor's lab so they could thank her for the gift. When they arrived, Professor Juniper had yet another surprise in store for them. Pokedexes. They could be fully-fledged trainers now. Go on adventures with their companions. The prospect of it floored Hanky. To visit the whole country, not having to stay put in Nuvema Town. That would be freedom. Professor Juniper suggested that Hanky give a name to his new companion. Looter. Looter the Oshawott. The little guy seemed very lax about the whole situation. Looter had even seemed relaxed about battling. As if it required very little effort to play-fight.

Unfortunately, Bianca's father didn't see things the same way. But she left home anyway. Hanky wondered why the man put up such a fight against her leaving. His own mother did no such thing. In fact, she seemed to want him gone. Even gave him a new pair of shoes so he would run faster when he left town. Of course, all shoe advertisements promise that you'll run faster. Maybe it was the excitement of leaving for a journey. Maybe it was the shoes. Maybe it was the smell of fresh food wafting from the next town over. Whatever it was, he couldn't wait to get out.

The three friends decided to take a step out into Route 1 all together, marking the beginning of their journey.

While traveling the peaceful route, Hanky was occasionally pelted by various objects. Small nuts, berries, and even a few twigs that managed to lodge themselves in his long hair. He pulled his hat down further and kept moving. Moments later, something began chittering angrily in front of him. The impish creature was infuriated that Hanky had ignored its "jokes." It attacked. Fortunately, Looter handled the Patrat easily. Hanky reached for one of the pokeballs in his bag. He was prepared to add another companion to his team. The Patrat, exhausted from brawling with Looter, was too tired to object. As Hanky held the pokeball containing the Patrat, he thought of the creature's eyes. Large, piercing eyes that seem to decide your fate. Like a judge. The Judge.


Current team:

Looter, the Oshawott. Lv.6, Lax nature.
The Judge, a Patrat. Lv.4, Impish nature.

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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Gelatino on Sun Jul 28, 2013 12:06 pm

You have good rhetoric. I'm gonna keep an eye on this.
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by tailoredGoose on Sun Jul 28, 2013 3:46 pm

ooo I like this! I'll also be keeping an eye :3
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Hanky Panky on Sun Jul 28, 2013 5:02 pm

I'm taking a quick break today to train a secret santa gift. But I'll definitely update sometime this week. Glad you guys like it!

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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Dregadude on Sun Jul 28, 2013 8:34 pm

Nice! When I feel like it maybe I'll draw a first panel for this, if you want.
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by NinteNerd on Sun Jul 28, 2013 8:59 pm

yes this is good. i'll be taking notes about writing.
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Hanky Panky on Tue Jul 30, 2013 11:21 pm

And the moment that a few of you may have been waiting for:


When Hanky reached Accumula town, both of his friends, along with Professor Juniper, were waiting for him.

"Why don't you kids come with me," Juniper asked. "I'll show you something about what you can find in every town!" She led the trio to the local pokemon center. "These centers are a trainer's best friend, you know. Not only can you buy supplies like potions and pokeballs, but there's also free healthcare! Er, for your pokemon. Fly home and see your mother if you're sick. She'll know whether or not you have health insurance."

There was a pause. Hanky just looked around.

"Anyway! The nurses here will be happy to help you heal your pokemon. Now be good little trainers and fill those pokedexes!" Juniper waved to Hanky and his friends as she left the pokemon center.

Cheren glanced back toward Hanky and Bianca. He was bemused. "What did she mean about health insurance?" Bianca shrugged. Hanky shook his head. Cheren cleared his throat. "Regardless, we should all heal our pokemon. No point in running on half a tank when a fill up's free!"

Back outside the pokemon center, a crowd was gathering. They were watching a line of what looked to be uniformed medieval knights. Or more likely, people dressing up for a renaissance fair. Hanky and Cheren stood at the back of the crowd and watched. Bianca, meanwhile, was being a stereotypical female because Nintendo wrote her that way still shopping.

An old man wearing what appeared to be a shower curtain topped with a crown stepped out from behind the line of apparent knights. He cleared his throat, indicating that he intended for the crowd to quiet down, then spoke.

"My name is Ghetsis. I am here today representing One-A-Day 50+. Er, Team Plasma. I want to talk to you all today about pokemon. Specifically, releasing them. You see, I want to challenge your perception that pokemon and people are partners in life. Is it fair that we treat them like pets and tools? Is it fair that we force them to fight? That we force them to live inside tiny capsules that we carry on our belts? I want you to think about your pokemon. Is it fair to them that we use them on a daily basis with no regard to how they feel or what they want to do? Pokemon are living beings who have vast, limitless potential. Our responsibility is to learn from them, not use them. And the only way we can do so in a fair manner is to liberate them! I ask you today to consider liberating your pokemon so that you can truly live as equals! Thank you, everyone, for your time and your attention."

Ghetsis and his group of renaissance nerds left soon after the speech was over. The crowd dissipated, but Hanky and Cheren remained. Cheren turned to Hanky and said, "That was... really weird." Hanky nodded.

As they turned to go their separate ways, a trainer with light green hair approached the two boys. He looked kind of spacy. "Your pokemon are talking. Can you hear it?"

Hanky shook his head and took a step backward.

"How sad," the trainer continued. "I'm a trainer too, you know. But I still wonder, do you think pokemon are truly happy in their pokeballs?"

Hanky shrugged. He didn't know where this conversation was going. It was all too strange. He'd had enough weirdos for one day.

The trainer pulled a pokeball from his belt. "My name is N. And your name is Hanky, I believe? Let me hear your pokemon's voice, Hanky!"

N released the Purrloin from its pokeball. Hanky adopted the same visage as before, when he battled against Cheren and Bianca. He called out The Judge. Judge this guy, he thought.

The Patrat's piercing glare must have done something, because N's Purrloin did nothing but cower and hiss the entire battle. Once, it batted a paw at The Judge, but The Judge made short work of his opponent.

After the battle, N looked down. He refused to look either Cheren or Hanky in the eyes. "I must get stronger," he mumbled. "I have to get stronger so I can save my friends from this horrible fate. We will meet again, Hanky." He walked away, and disappeared into the woods behind Accumula Town.

Cheren glanced at Hanky. He didn't even say anything this time. He simply sighed, and shook his head. "Let's go," he finally said. The two young men accompanied each other to Route 2. There, they went their separate ways.

On Route 2, Hanky encountered an impish Lillipup who thought it was a fun game to attack his ankles. She seemed to be energetic. He captured the pup and named her Sasha. If nothing else, she would make a good friend for the journey.



Current Team:

Looter, Lv.7 Oshawott
The Judge, Lv.7 Patrat
Sasha, Lv.7 Lillipup


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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Dregadude on Wed Jul 31, 2013 1:43 am

How much of the nuzlocke did you play before starting writing? I'm just wondering how much planning there is here, since it's all been great so far.
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Hanky Panky on Wed Jul 31, 2013 8:31 am

Right now I'm caught up to where I am in-game. I haven't even bothered with the first badge yet.

I'm a very spontaneous writer.

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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Gelatino on Wed Jul 31, 2013 12:03 pm

Nice work. I like how you know where emphasis is needed in your writing; a lot of early writers have problems with that, especially with pokemon. Most beginners would have drawn out that battle with N for dramatic effect or such, but you only wrote a paragraph, and a short one at that. I'm glad that you recognize the things that are important to write about. Clearly this is going to be a good creative writing exercise for you, and I'm eager to see more.
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by OverlordJ on Wed Jul 31, 2013 7:34 pm

You are very good at writing, the story feels fitting, you know which parts should be kep short and which parts are important and deserve more text.

I like how you add little details without really going to far away from the actual game.

Oh and I love that you didn't call them Team Plasma, but that's a personal thing Very Happy 
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Hanky Panky on Sun Aug 04, 2013 7:11 pm


Having defeated Bianca without any troubles, Hanky strode into Striaton City, shoulders high. He wondered if he'd be leaving the same way. After healing at the pokemon center, a stranger flagged him down in town.

"Hey. You look like a young trainer. Want a tip? Go train at the Dreamyard. That's where all the budding trainers around here go to prepare for the gym challenge."

Hanky stared at the person talking for a second, then walked off. He'd go find the Dreamyard and drop a can of whoop-ass right in the middle of it. It didn't take him long. There weren't but two trainers, and neither of them put up much of a fight. Another trainer who didn't want to battle offered to give Hanky a pokemon. It was a rambunctious, naughty little monkey. The Pansear reminded Hanky of a game he'd played as a child. He named it Diddy Kong.

Hanky returned to the main part of Striaton City to find an old man standing in front of the local gym. He stepped forward, intending to go inside, but the man stopped him and said, "If you're looking for the gym leader, he's down the street. Probably teaching at the trainers' school. Go find him and bring him back, and you'll be able to challenge him."

Cheren was waiting for Hanky at the trainers' school, but the gym leader was nowhere in sight. "Hanky, will you battle with me? I want to learn how to battle with items." Of course the young trainer was interested in a fight. He always was. The battle ended uneventfully, with Diddy Kong mopping the floor with both of Cheren's pokemon.

It was finally time to challenge the gym leader. Hanky proceeded through the gym itself without trouble. Everyone was weak. They were weak and useless. He began to imagine himself as untouchable. No trainer, gym leader or otherwise, could stand up to his might. He smirked. The gym leader ought to watch out, he thought.

When Hanky approached the gym leader, he had a smug look on his face. Cilan was unimpressed. He'd seen trainers come and go. Nothing was different about this one.

"I'll be testing your capabilities as a trainer today. I specialize in grass types. I hope you're ready."

Hanky nodded, and released his first pokemon. The Judge ought to take care of everything. But Cilan's Lillipup was excited. It was ready for battle. It tore through The Judge. Hanky couldn't react. The Judge didn't move. It felt like his core was boiling, but that his skin was icy. How could this have happened? He was going to be the strongest trainer in Unova. Strong trainers don't lose pokemon. They destroy the competition. He tried to return The Judge to its pokeball. But the ball wouldn't recall the Patrat. It was dead. Numb, Hanky kicked The Judge to the side, and sent out another pokemon. Sasha, eager for revenge, dispatched the opposing creature. But it wasn't long before Cilan's Pansage tore through Sasha. And then Diddy Kong. And then Looter. Hanky sank to the floor, surrounded by the bodies of his companions. They had died because he was cocky. He'd failed as a trainer. He looked up at Cilan, teary eyed. The gym leader returned his gaze. Without emotion, he said, "Welcome to the real world, kid."



Current Team:

null

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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by d_what on Sun Aug 04, 2013 7:16 pm

!


So you're red then

Man
First gym
OUCH

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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by phantasmalDexterity on Sun Aug 04, 2013 7:21 pm

Woah, damn.
That's... really?
What happened?
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Hanky Panky on Sun Aug 04, 2013 7:43 pm

One of the waiter trainers in the gym got a crit on Diddy Kong and he died early and at that point I knew that it wasn't going to end well so I challenged the gym leader and wiped. Gonna keep playing as if nothing happened but as far as writing the story is concerned, it's over. Which isn't really a bad thing because i have lots of projects on my plate right now like training a shit load of pokemon and Persona 3 and SMT IV and getting back into real writing. So i'm not really disappointed with the outcome. it's kind of relieving, actually.

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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by OverlordJ on Mon Aug 05, 2013 12:50 am

Welll, damn...

Pretty short Nuzlocke right there...

It was awesomly written, and when you aid how confident you were, I suspected that some of your Pokemons would be defeated. But all of them?

Damn...
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Re: Hanky Panky's White Nuzlocke

Post by Hanky Panky on Tue Aug 06, 2013 11:49 pm


oj what happened was that DK died early and at that point i knew i was fucked.

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